Poptart

I went to an all girls’ high school where the unofficial school motto was “Girls Can Do Anything” (I think the official motto was in Latin and said something like “Strive for Excellence” LOL) and over the years I've managed to do things I didn’t think I ever could.

Case(s) in point:

Climbing mountains. I have conquered Mt Ruapehu (1992), Mt Fuji (1997) and Ben Nevis (2000). I have no desire to conquer any more mountains, peaks or hills.

Being naked in front of complete strangers (you look dopey wearing togs in a Japanese onsen LOL). After the initial shock of having 25 small Japanese women see your fleshy white thighs, pot belly and droopy boobs, it’s quite liberating. And then you forget and it becomes a non-issue.

Drink. A lot. I can drink most people under the table. Not sure if that's something to really brag about, but hey. It's something I can do LOL.

But there are just something’s I can’t do.

I cant:

Grow and maintain long fingernails. They get to a certain length and then break. So I’ve given up. I did try fake nails, but that got too costly and too high maintenance. So it’s now back to short and square-ish.

Cheer or support any English sports team or individual. I don’t know why but I have a pathological dislike for English sports teams. I think it could stem from a time when I lived in London and saw the Poms play the All Blacks at Twickenham. They lost to NZ. But then had the cheek to do a victory lap around the ground. Ummm? You lost, get off the bloody field and let the winners do a congratulatory lap around the ground LOL.

Flirt. I am naturally very chatty and outgoing anyway, but if I find someone attractive and like them, I tend to clam up. A sure sign if I’m keen on a fella is when I’ve suddenly gone mute LOL. My mum is a champion flirter. She’ll flirt with men, women and even children LOL. She’s flirted her way to free drinks, free dinners, first class flight upgrades, free hotel rooms. I can’t even flirt to get a free glass of water, I am pathetic. Obviously didn’t inherit the flirt gene from my mother then.

Use a snorkel. I am hopeless at it. It's very embarrassing. Even my 7 year old niece can use one! It's not like it's some really technical or difficult piece of equipment, but so far the ability to use one is completely lost on me.