Saturday, September 30, 2006
Isn't the internet a wonderful thing!

Look what I found when
surfing around today!

Australian Rugby League players...naked!














































































































































































You can see more pics
here.

I think Mr June (Nick Youngquest) and Mr September (Ben Ross) are my favourites LOL.

Oh, and as you can see I've changed the blog template. I still like the old one so it might make an appearance again.


Tart at 5:25 PM | 3 comments
Friday, September 29, 2006

When did I stop being a DIY girl?

I used to do most things myself, now I:

  • get my eyebrows threaded by the little Indian lady at the spa (she's fantastic)

  • get a leg and bikini wax (Kylie my beauty therapist has seen my hoo-ha more times than I can remember LOL)

  • get my hair cut and coloured (Kelly is a fantastic stylist, I'll never let anyone else touch my hair)

  • get my hair styled for a big night out or "event" (see above)

  • get a spray tan (those spray booths are so cool)

  • get a manicure from the Korean girl at the nail salon (she's fantastic, fast and good and cheap!)


The only thing I do myself is shave my armpits (I did have them waxed once and the pain was excruitating! I know what your thinking, "surely it can't hurt more than a bikini wax?" I assure you it can. Yowza. Never again). And I also do my own pedicure. The reason is that I hate anyone touching my feet. I get all twitchy and giggly. Quite embarrassing.

    5 or 7 years ago, I did everything myself (well, apart from cutting my hair - both on my head and "down south" LOL). Now I get pay someone else to do it. I guess that's the main reason why I'm not a DIY girl anymore. I can afford to get someone else, a trained professional, do it for me. Which is a good thing...you should've seen my eyebrows *shudder*.

    Today is one of those lovely gorgeous Wellington spring days! Blue skies, sunny and no breeze. It's not really hot, maybe about 16-17 degrees (not sure what that is in Fahrenheit..60?). So, it's not a scorcher, but that doesn't mean some people out there realise that! This morning on the bus I sat next to a girl in short shorts, a tank top and jandals LOL. People. Just because the sun is shining does not mean it's 30 degrees outside LOL.

    Edited 4.06pm: okay, blogger is being funky. I had to rewrite and publish this post. Weird. I'm playing around with new templates, so maybe I hit a wrong button? Grr.


    Tart at 10:48 AM | 3 comments
    Tuesday, September 26, 2006
    So, I've got those three weddings to go to soon.

    Which means I have three very good friends who are planning their weddings.

    Two of them are doing great, no fuss, no muss.

    No histrionics. No dramas.

    Except one.

    One friend has turned from a quiet, well meaning, sane, smart individual into...


    Bridezilla.

    Everything from the flowers to the length of the grooms tie is a BIG DEAL.

    I got an email from her today, saying that she wants to meet with me soon, to discuss what I'm wearing to her wedding, because she has some "thoughts".

    Um. Why? What thoughts? Please don't tell me she's going to dictate what I can and can't wear. If she does, she can just shove it! LOL. I have no idea what I'm going to wear to her wedding, seeing as it's like 5 months away!

    Bloody wedding. Turning my normal calm cool accountant friend into this harpy shrew!


    Tart at 10:58 PM | 4 comments
    Monday, September 25, 2006















    It's just the 2007 Dieux du Stade calendar!

    This immensely popular calendar features hunky French rugby players (my personal favourite is Julien Arias, that's him below, he's so pretty).















    Though I have to say that some of the pics are a tad "gay porn" for my liking. But that won't stop me from perving at the pictures LOL.














































    More pics here.

    Man, I wish the All Blacks did a calendar like this... LOL.


    Tart at 9:10 PM | 3 comments
    Friday, September 22, 2006
    It's Friday, 8.30pm and I'm at home.

    Again.

    For what seems like the hundredth Friday in a row.

    I have got to get a life.

    It seems like months since I last had a Friday night out drinking.

    I'm going to have to make a concerted effort to get out a bit more, otherwise my arse is going to make permanent indentations in my couch.

    Tart at 8:34 PM | 1 comments
    Thursday, September 21, 2006
    Friday tomorrow. I can't believe how quickly this week had gone. Seemed to just fly by.

    I went out today and bought two new books - a biography on
    Nancy Wake and With Their Backs to the World: Portraits from Serbia by Asne Seierstad. I bought the books from an independent book shop that I love. It's one of those shops that has an amazing array of books, CDs and DVDs. I must have spent a good hour in there and I only just managed to check out a corner of books on the ground floor. As it's an independent book shop, they tend to stock mostly contemporary and literary fiction and non-fiction. I didn't see many mass market paperbacks or popular authors like John Grisham, Dan Brown, Marian Keyes etc. It was kinda nice LOL.

    And speaking of nice, I've been on the New Woman magazine website, checking out the 100 Hot Men I Can Date. Damn I wish I lived in Australia (although a couple of the hot men are kiwis LOL). If I lived in Australia, I'd be tempted to send a message to a few men, like:

    Stephen Tucker (nice smile)
    Paul Murray (crinkly eyes, looks like he'd be fun
    Maz Quinn (kiwi surfer, silent type)
    Adam Grocke (cute!)
    Tim Mullen (looks sincere, serious... probably could do with a bit of fun LOL)
    Pita Taufatofua (hunky PI boy!)
    David Russell (looks fun and very cool)
    Alex Hall (dimples and a smirk LOL)

    Eight blokes. Out of a 100? That's not even 10%. God I am so damn fussy LOL. I thought I'd have picked more than 8 LOL.

    Tart at 9:04 PM | 4 comments
    Tuesday, September 19, 2006
    So, Justin Timberlake is bringing sexy back (back?, I never knew it had gone, oh well LOL).

    I quite like JT, he's cute and cool in a totally non-threatening, attainable way. And you know he'd be sweet to your nana too.

    Anyway, thinking about JT reminded me of my high school boyfriend, QDM (Quick Draw McGraw LOL). QDM was well intentioned, but a bit dim, sweet, earnest, eager to please (just like the cartoon horse LOL). Cute. And looked a little like JT.

    QDM and I met at high school. I went to an all girls school, he went to the all boys school and the boys school were having a dance and the girls from our school were invited. It was March 1989, I was in 4th Form (I was 14) and I went to the dance with a bunch of girlfriends (I even remember what I wore - it was the height of fashion to wear ruffle and bubble skirts, I was wearing a black bubble skirt, which made me look like a wombat, LOL).

    As we were dancing away (in a group, in a circle LOL), we managed to inch our way across the gymnasium floor until we were near where Richie (the cutest kid in 4th Form and the object of my friend Sharon's affections) and his friends were sitting. Remember, boys never danced in 1989. In tried and true teenage fashion, my friend Sharon wouldn't go up and talk to Richie herself, she sent a messenger, me. So, I bowled up to Richie and asked if he wanted to dance with my friend Sharon (and pointed to her in all her peach ruffle skirted glory). Richie had a mullet and wore a leather jacket. So you know he was cool.


    He said he'd only dance with Sharon if one of her friends would dance with one of his friends. He pointed to his mate. I said I'd dance with him (I know, I am such a good friend LOL). So Sharon got to dance to "Straight Up" by Paula Abdul (her favourite song) with Richie and I got to dance with QDM.

    Apparently, when you're 14, dancing with someone at a high school dance means you are immediately boyfriend and girlfriend LOL. QDM and I had one dance and then sat on the seats positioned around the gym floor and kissed. With tongues, which I had no clue about, and was so perplexed as to why his tongue was in my mouth and what should I do with mine? LOL.

    Anyway, QDM and I went out for about 6 months. Nothing very serious. He was a good kisser and used to buy me banana milkshakes at McDonald's LOL.

    Then I had the biggest, most unattainable crush on an older boy (by 3 years, wow LOL), MJ. MJ was a popular senior student at the local boys school. House Captain, Sports Captain, Prefect etc...


    MJ was hot. Tall, tanned, blonde. Played rugby and cricket. Was a life guard at the local swimming pool (where I would spend every weekend during the summer so I could watch him LOL). I never did anything about the crush, except go on and on about him to my friends. This of course, made them nuts. Every October there's an A&P Show (agricultural and pastural) held in my hometown. This is a three day event held at the local showgrounds, that has everything from showjumping to tractors, exhibitions to ferris wheels. It was a big thing to go when you were a kid/teenager, as there were fun rides and stalls etc.

    During the height of my crush on MJ, which would have been in 1989 LOL, i went with my very best friend to the A&P Show. We spent most of our time on the rides. We were on the ferris wheel when I spotted MJ. My heart nearly pounded out of my chest! My best friend saw him near the ferris wheel and as our car went past, yelled out to him "Hey MJ, my friend Tart loves you!!". Oh man, I can still feel the embarrassment now LOL. He looked up at me and smiled.

    We got off the ferris wheel and despite my fervent wish for the ground to open up and swallow me whole, found MJ waiting at the exit. As we walked past, he smiled at me again and said "hey". That was it. I went from crush to love in about 3.2 seconds LOL.


    From that moment on, I was obsessed with MJ. I used to bike past his house twice a day - on the way to, and from, school. As luck would have it, two things happened that meant I saw him on a regular basis. His best mate, Martin, started going out with my best mate, Kylie and we got to hang around in a big group together quite a bit. And my father used to coach him in a regional rep rugby team. I'd see him, we'd talk, flirt a bit, but that was it.

    Now you'd think spending time in each others company, one of us would pluck up the courage to ask each other out? Wrong LOL. My little 15 year old brain thought, instead of actually like, talking to him, I'd send in a request to the local radio station - Hot 93FM! - to play a song for him during their nightly "Request Show" (9-10pm). So I wrote in and asked them to play "If You Don't Know Me" by Simply Red (I wanted to be different, as most soppy requests were for "Crazy For You" by Madonna and I wanted to be cooler than that LOL) and I asked them to dedicate it to MJ from "the coaches daughter". Cool huh? (no, tragic LOL). So I wait and the next Tuesday night I hear "our" song. I squeal and my heart thumps and the next day at school all my friends are like "I heard your song last night" and "was that your request on 93FM?" etc etc.

    I didn't see MJ for a week or so, but then about two weeks later, I hear "She Drives Me Crazy" by the Fine Young Cannibals on the Request Show and it's dedicated to "my full name, from MJ". SQUEEEEEEAAAAAAAALLLLLL. Oh man! I got a request!

    The next day at school was probably one of the best days of my high school life LOL. It seemed like every girl in school heard it and would say "I heard your request last night, that was so cool". "MJ totally likes you" etc, I was for a moment, the coolest girl in, not only 4th form, but the whole school. Some of the 7th Formers even spoke to me LOL.

    The next time I saw MJ he smiled and said hi and we chatted but neither one of us mentioned the radio requests LOL. And so it went back to me being gaga over MJ and him being sweet and nice and flirting with me. And then he left to go to university. So I hardly saw him, except during the long summer holidays when he'd be back in our hometown.

    During this time, I got an after school job working in a deli. One of the women working there was, would you believe it, MJ's mother! She was so nice and very funny. And one day, after I'd been working there for about 6 months she goes, "you're the girl that has a crush on my son, aren't you?". I laughed and said an embarrassed yes, she smiled and said "he likes you too".

    I'd like to say that this crush turned into something more after that revelation, but it went on, flirting and talking, for months and amazingly, for years.


    I was 18 and had two semi-serious boyfriends by the time MJ and I finally met again. And it happened in such a funny way. I'd gone with my Dad to watch a rugby game between our provinical team and a visiting team (MJ was playing top grade rugby for the visiting team) and as I was walking down the steps of the grandstand, MJ's team were walking towards the grandstand, into the changing rooms. I looked up and saw MJ, all sweaty and dirty, pulling off his headgear. We somehow managed to catch each others eyes (it wasn't a big grandstand, I'm from a small town LOL) and as I walked down a few more steps to reach ground level, MJ comes up to me and says "still got that crush?". Damn, I didn't think he knew LOL.

    We talked, he asked me to wait for him outside the grounds, while he had to shower and get changed (which I did - Dad didn't seem to mind me staying behind LOL). I remember waiting and watching the exit, and when he walked through the gate and into the sun, I swear he was glowing!

    Anyway, we went to the pub and from that moment on, we pretty much spent all our time together. I even went to the same university as him so we could be together. Awww. We went out for nearly 4 years, broke up just after my 21st birthday.

    I haven't seen for a few years now, the last time I saw him was in France in 2004. I bumped into him in a bar in Montmarte. What a small world! He was still gorgeous, still playing rugby and still making fun of me and my crush on him LOL.

    Tart at 4:50 PM | 2 comments
    Monday, September 18, 2006
    A while back, the lovely people from BenBella Books contacted me about a new book they were publishing - This is Chick Lit.

    Would I like a free copy? Would I? Is Paris Hilton wonky eyed and talentless? LOL

    Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


    This is Chick Lit is an anthology of short stories, edited by Lauren Baratz-Logsted, that "celebrates what it means to write chick lit and to read it - and shows once and for all that you shouldn't judge a book by its pastel cover".

    I am a big fan of chick lit, and have been since I first read Bridget Jones's Diary when it first appeared in a newspaper column in England back in the mid to late 90s. I am always surprised by the derisive comments I get from people, especially other women, over my reading preferences. (At least I read!)

    Chick Lit is looked down on, scorned as second rate, the "literary underclass". It's seen as stupid, fluffy and frivolous, inferior to other genres, in particular, literary fiction. This view is often, if not always, held by people who've only read a few, if any, Chick Lit books. And what surprised me, this view is often held by other women writers.

    Chick lit is written by women, about women and for women and therefore it is seen as lacking any literary merit. An author in the anthology writes "an author recently commented that the term chick lit sounds as if the writing is about, for, and by women, nothing more. Nothing more?! Why isn't that enough?"

    The stories in this anthology demonstrate that not all chick lit stories are about "a sad, lonely pathetic single girl in the city looking for Mr Right, all the while shopping for Manolo's and Prada bags".

    Sure, some chick lit is about that. And you know, there's nothing wrong with it. But a lot of chick lit, and the stories in this anthology reflect this, are about women in various stages of their lives, in various jobs or positions, coping with issues like infidelity, motherhood, returning to the workforce, dating and yes, fashion! LOL

    So, if you're a Chick Lit lover, I recommend this book. If you've always turned your nose up at Chick Lit, I recommend this book too, I think you'll be surprised at how
    entertaining, clever, irreverant, magical, fun and good the stories are.

    Tart at 4:37 PM | 2 comments
    Friday, September 15, 2006
    Dear Occupier

    We, the undersigned, would like to bring to your attention a few issues that are causing concern amongst several members.

    A few members have been working long hours, several have had to do unpaid overtime in order to cope with the increased consumption of liquid intoxicants being ingested in large amounts, over what appears to be a short time frame.

    Although we detect these liquid intoxicants as being a derivative of the red grape and could technically be considered a fruit, we regret to notify you that it cannot be thought of as part of the "5 Plus a Day" fruit and vegetable servings nutritionalists and health professionals recommend as the required amount for a person a day.

    We ask that you replace the liquid with something else, perhaps water, in order for the overworked members to recover. If this request is denied, we will be forced to evacuate the liquid intoxicant, something I am sure you wish to avoid as it could lead to a rather uncomfortable situation.

    Secondly there has been a significant increase in the consumption of Nice and Natural Natural Nut
    Apricot Bars. Although a delicious and tasty snack, our concern is that these should not be consumed as a meal replacement. We would like to remind you that for us to function at optimum levels, a well balanced diet is necessary. After several days of deliberations, we have unanimously agreed that more fish and protein is needed.

    Poor workplace facilities, combined with the stress and irritation caused by your failure to remove the plastic lens to correct faulty vision has led to two of our hardest working members going on strike.

    If removal of the lenses is not forthcoming immediately, we will be forced into a lockdown where access to the site will be hindered by our Union Reps - Conjuctivitis.

    However, it is not all doom and gloom. The current deforestation efforts in the Southern region are appreciated, especially as the summer season draws near.

    The ten terminal members of the deep south would also like to congratulate you on your timely and efficient repainting scheme. The bright and fresh colour is liked by all.

    We hope that our concerns are met with positive outcomes.

    Please do not hestitate to contact our Head office if you have any further questions.

    Yours sincerely

    Your Body Corporate


    Tart at 3:44 PM | 2 comments
    Tuesday, September 12, 2006
    Between now and March next year I have:

    • three weddings
    • 19 family birthdays (including a 21st, and two 50ths)
    • 12 friends birthdays
    • one soon-to-be niece/nephew

    I'm going to have to think of creative and cheap present ideas for the weddings and birthdays, as I am now entering a phase of enforced frugality.

    The reason I'm on a budget is that I've moved my proposed trip to Italy in December, to May next year. Also, I'm including a few extra side trips (Morocco, Portugal) plus I'll spend a bit more time in London and I'll be gone for longer, 6 weeks instead of 3.

    I'm quite excited about going to Portugal again, I miss that place (I lived there for a while) and it will be a good chance to catch up with friends/family and see my adorable old house again.

    Tart at 9:16 PM | 1 comments
    Thursday, September 07, 2006
    I'm not a particularly impulsive person, but sometimes I get urges to do something silly, out of the ordinary, spontaneous.

    The other day I really wanted to go and get my hair cut off into a spikey crop, dye it platinum blonde and be a rock chick. I haven't had short hair in years, probably 6 or 7, and I remember how much a pain in the arse it was to upkeep. But I reckon a platinum spikey crop would rock. I was almost at the hairdressers LOL. But I know my hairdresser would've talked me out out of it.

    I bumped into an old boyfriend I haven't seen since university and Politics 101, way back in 1992. He was with his wife and he introduced me to her. As I was smiling and saying hello, I had this urge to blurt out to her "your husband and I had sex in the university library, twice!". I clamped my mouth shut, just in case the words decided to come out.

    Sometimes I give in to an urge. Like on Tuesday, on my way back from the library, I spotted this gorgeous cabinet in the window of a store. I went it, took a quick look and then bought it! Boom. Good bye $450. I didn't really need this cabinet. Still, it does look very cool in my lounge.

    Also at the library, I had this urge to play around with the 'shelve by colour' section of the chick lit books. I've blogged about this before, but the city library likes to shelve its chick lit books not by author like rest of the library, oh no, but buy colour. So, I moved one book (I know, I'm such a rebel!). Take a look....






















    See it? The pink book amongst all the baby blue covers? I did that LOL. And took a photo as evidence on my new camera phone. Wow. Talk about subversive behaviour.

    In the past, these urges have resulted in me and my best friend flashing our boobs in a photo. Going topless at a beach in France (hey, everyone else was), getting a tattoo, moving to Portugal, booking a last minute holiday to Fiji and dragging my sister along with me, eating horse steak, eating sparrow, holding a cobra, dancing in the rain, flying from London to New York for a dirty weekend and not to mention the myriad of impulse buy items of clothing, shoes, bags etc LOL.


    Sometimes I wish I could be more spontaneous. I do try, it's just not that easy trying to organise it into my schedule LOL.


    Tart at 1:33 PM | 4 comments
    Monday, September 04, 2006
    How old is too old to have a crush?

    I am 32 years old and I have thumping crushes on:

    The cute barista where I get my coffee from in the morning (he's got the most intense brown eyes and the most luscious lips)

    My good friends husband (he is probably the sexiest, funniest, coolest, cleverest, totally-in-love-his-wife-it's-verging-on-sickmaking guy I know)

    Steve Maharey (wish he was "our" minister LOL)

    The Guy From The Bus Who Looks Like Wentworth Miller (I think I need to do a bit more stalking!)

    Ric and Jack from Home & Away (These two are so damn cute they need to have more sceens in H&A with their shirts off, I'd consider a humanitary gesture for all the women aged 13-100).

    And not to mention some of my celebrity crushes:
    • Wentworth Miller
    • Johnny Depp
    • Angelina Jolie
    • Ryan Philippe
    • Andy Irons
    • David Beckham
    • Jessica Alba

    Is there a certain age in life, where these hopeless crushes just go away? Or am I going to turn into one of those pervy old ladies? (Turn into? I think I'm probably already one LOL).


    Tart at 3:54 PM | 5 comments
    Friday, September 01, 2006
    Five Fashion Items I Wish Would Disappear Overnight


    • Leggings/footless tights. I'm still recovering from the last time they were in fashion... in the 80s.
    • Slouchy boots. Again, I remember them from the 80s.
    • Knee-length boots with a fold-over top cuff. Honey, you look like Puss'n Boots!
    • Skinny legged grey jeans. Nothing screams BOGAN more than these hideous jeans.
    • Chunky, low slung belts. How about this. How about we re-discover our waists? Sounds like a good idea, right?

    Five Cocktails I Wish I Were Having Now, Instead of Sitting In My Lounge Watching 24

    • Mojito
    • Moscow Mule
    • Raspberry Martini
    • Sea Breeze
    • Cosmopolitan

    Five Famous Males I'd Shag If I Had The Chance

    • Johnny Depp
    • Wentworth Miller
    • David Beckham
    • Daniel Carter
    • Vin Diesel

    Five Places I Want To See Before I Die

    • Zanzibar
    • Maldives
    • The Seychelles
    • Marrakesh, Morroco
    • Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

    Tart at 9:19 PM | 4 comments