Why now?On Monday I received a card and a rather long letter from my ex boyfriend. We broke up in May, after being together for over two years, because he is on a 6-9 month film shoot overseas and I didn't want to wait around for him (it was rather more complicated than that, but I'm trying to cut a long story short).
Now, I'm not so sure I made the right decision.
This letter and card has really thrown me for a loop. He said that he loved me, missed me and that he was trying to give me space and time to sort things out but really, all that does is make him crazy and wish we were together again. Argh!
I mean, what am I to do now? Should I ignore the letter and continue to move on with my life? It's hard. I have that teeny tiny shred of doubt that maybe, just maybe, I let the love of my life, "the one"... leave, and what if I never find that again with someone else? Then the rational part of my brain says "yeah, but you don't believe in 'the one' anyway" LOL.
Josh isn't really a factor, sure I like him and we have a great time, but he's just a diversion...right?
Ah, I dunno. This is not really what I want to be dealing with right now LOL.
Maybe I should just chuck in men all together. I hear this celibacy thing could be a good idea (yeah, right) LOL.
Anyway, in other news. From now on, you can call me Domestic Goddess! Tonight, in between cooking dinner, folding laundry and watching Rockstar: Supernova, I baked a dozen muffins and two cakes. I am suitably impressed by myself LOL.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Tart at 9:43 PM |
4 Comments:
At 9:02 PM, 
said........
said........
Ann, I sent him an email saying I got his card and letter. I have no idea when/if he'll get this email LOL.
I just said that I really wasn't ready to make any decisions, and that I wasn't going to wait around etc. But... I said that when he got home, if we both wanted, we could perhaps talk about things...
So, we'll see. I'm still not 100% sure what I want LOL.
I just said that I really wasn't ready to make any decisions, and that I wasn't going to wait around etc. But... I said that when he got home, if we both wanted, we could perhaps talk about things...
So, we'll see. I'm still not 100% sure what I want LOL.
At 10:47 AM, 
said........
said........
Tart, when you met your ex, did you feel he was “the one” or has that really emerged since you broke up? If you didn’t feel it initially, I don’t think he’s it. If you did, then you do need to look at finding a way to be together (call me a romantic).
Down to earth: you do need to look at where you are at now, and if he is the sort of man you need in your life where you can totally live and be who you are. What I mean is: if you took away the past you have with him, and looked at yourself at this instant, do his qualities, character and soul complement who you are? Because if you are to make this decision to get back together, you can’t do so with a rose-coloured ideal about the past: this is about Poptart today and not Poptart six months ago.
If everything does fit with you today, then I say play it one day at a time, and look at getting back together with him, and see where things will lead. Otherwise, keep your options open. I believe you made the right decision by saying that you two should talk things over when you are in the same country.
Down to earth: you do need to look at where you are at now, and if he is the sort of man you need in your life where you can totally live and be who you are. What I mean is: if you took away the past you have with him, and looked at yourself at this instant, do his qualities, character and soul complement who you are? Because if you are to make this decision to get back together, you can’t do so with a rose-coloured ideal about the past: this is about Poptart today and not Poptart six months ago.
If everything does fit with you today, then I say play it one day at a time, and look at getting back together with him, and see where things will lead. Otherwise, keep your options open. I believe you made the right decision by saying that you two should talk things over when you are in the same country.
Isn't this the way it always happens? You start something with one guy and that other guy comes alone. When it rains it poors.
If you got that gut feeling when you read ex's letter, felt a strong pull for him, I don't know maybe you should go with that feeling. He obviously loves you a lot and if you love him that much than you should probably see where it goes. But I'm no good with this stuff, I'm too much of a romantic so I don't think clearly when there is potential for HEA, LOL, I'm a sap (I got all giddy reading your post, that's how bad I am LOL).
Good luck babe! Let us know how it goes :)